Epilepsy,  Uncategorized

Not According To Plan

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time.” – Leo Tolstoy

I tucked myself into bed after a long and tedious sixteen year old, Jr. High School day. Drifting and floating thoughts of the following day. Schoolwork, teachers, friends, perhaps a boy I had a crush on. Reflections of the future. Who I wanted to be career-wise, where I wanted to be in this world. Children, a husband, a house, even a tiny vegetable garden just like my grandfather. I closed my eyes in preparation for a new day of school only to wake, every limb weak and powerless. Dazed and nauseous. Being led down the stairs by paramedics. Asked if I’d taken any illegal drugs earlier in the night. Placed upon a stretcher and into an ambulance, seeing my mother and sister with a terrified look upon their faces, my brain strained to figure out just what happened. I later learned that I’d had a grand mal seizure right after going to bed.

Needless to say, that was not according to plan.

After a year of medication, I returned to normality. Seizure freedom.

As I continued on my teenage journey, I lived, I learned, I matured and I grew wiser. We never stop this very cycle throughout our lifetime. One thing remained prominent, tucked away within my heart. I had a desire since a young age to be blessed with the perfect man and start a family. Parenthood had always swelled my heart with joy at the very thought and I couldn’t wait to experience this with the love of my life.

On my twelfth birthday, it was asked of me, “What would you like?” and I responded, “A baby name book so that I can can decide a name for my future son/daughter!” and this is what I received.

I was blessed having married the love of my life in August 2008, at the age of twenty-two. Our birthdays were just four months to follow. My heart overflowed with immense happiness, hopes and dreams to follow. However, four months following our marriage, driving to purchase birthday and Christmas presents, I never made it to the store. Turning left, the flashing of a white light blanketed my vision. Every limb weak and powerless and I willed my foot to reach the brake. Through multiple front yards, over curbs and eventually slamming into a tree, I crashed. I would soon discover that I would be diagnosed with the neurological condition, epilepsy.

Needless to say, that was not according to plan.

Parenthood, and many other plans set in place as a married couple and as individuals had to be readjusted or placed on the back burner as my health had to be top priority. Yes, these things hurt quite a bit and at times they still can hurt. However it’s important to know that plans don’t always work out and it’s going to be just fine. A new path will present itself to you.

You must harbor faith and speak it in times of doubt.

Is it over for my spouse and I regarding parenthood? Absolutely not! We most certainly can still have children and I thank God for that. When the time is right, how wonderful a day that will be.

Are dreams and opportunities over when a diagnosis barges into life? Absolutely not! As a matter of fact, let it challenge you to overcome. To rise above. To become greater than you’ve ever been, mind, body and spirit.

What are some ways that you’ve overcome since your/your loved ones diagnosis? What are some ways you would like to overcome?

Needless to say, epilepsy is not according to plan but responding in an inspirational, motivational, optimistic way is not according to epilepsy’s plan!

I am a happily-ever-after wife, an Epilepsy Diagnosee, Advocate for Epilepsy Awareness (The Epilepsy Network), life lover & Christ inspired! Life is a journey and I'm loving every moment of it. Even the bumps in the road!


  • Mandy Krzywonski

    Sitting at work and came across this article on Facebook. I absolutely love it and it is wonderful to hear about other people in this world going through the very same struggles. Staying close to our faith and casting away the fear is so important. God will always be there during those moments when we need him most and can’t do anything ourselves.

    • Tiffany Kairos

      Yes, many of us are faced with similar hurdles along this rocky journey. My relationship with Jesus Christ is unbreakable, unshakable. In the beginning, I was afraid, but yes as you’ve said, fear must be cast away and we must take up faith. 🙂 Yes, in times of hardship or crisis we can easily forget that God is right there with us and always has been, however it’s so important to remember that He walks with us in all situations. To God be the glory. 🙂

  • Alison Zetterquist


    What a magnificent post! You and Tolstoy are ever wise.

    You’re the best,

    Alison Zetterquist

    P.S. Despite my epilepsy, I have a wonderful child and husband, too. Happily, I completely relate to your message.

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