Down I Go Up I Will Rise

In public, all alone, among family, my significant other, among friends, I have had the rug pulled out from under me unaware and prepared at the hands of seizures thousands of times. Epilepsy doesn’t have a schedule or doesn’t work around your schedule. Epilepsy doesn’t politely ask. Without permission, it takes control of the electrical activity of your brain and nervous system. Sending a surge of electricity throughout your entire body.

For a lot of people, this can be an emotionally painful and frustrating event.

I’ve lived with epilepsy for almost eight years. Almost the same amount of time that I’ve been married to my husband. Yes, I was diagnosed just four months after marrying the love of my life. Within those eight years, it has been a trying and tribulation of growth and a roller coaster of emotions.

I have grown immensely strong battling back against my condition with the love of my husband, family and what I like to call extended family of epilepsy fighters, caregivers and supporters.

Not every day is perfect, no. Living with epilepsy can test your faith, hope, temperament, convictions and will. I have certainly been tested and there have been times, that I have failed to live up to my expectations.

The most important thing to remember is to never, no matter how strong the storm, give up. Remind yourself,

“Down I go, up I will rise.”

Instead of filling your mind with what epilepsy has the ability to do, worries of when a seizure may pull the rug out from under you, fill your mind with what you have the ability to do. What you must do in order to not provoke a seizure and care for yourself.

  • Get adequate sleep each night
  • Take your seizure medication on time
  • Avoid alcohol
  • Learn stress management and relaxation techniques
  • Don’t smoke cigarettes
  • Eat a healthy diet
  • Avoid bright, flashing flickering lights

Staying down and being overcome, is not what you are meant to do. Don’t hand over the power of your emotions, ambitions, goals and dreams to epilepsy. You have the power to rise above epilepsy even if/when you go down.

With every seizure that comes, I remind myself that I can grow from this. I can learn from this. I can overcome this. Even if I find myself a tad frustrated or bummed.

Each of us that are living with epilepsy are at war with epilepsy and we must adopt a warrior mindset. We must know in our hearts, minds and souls that we refuse to back down and be defeated.

With every breath I take, I choose to fight back against epilepsy.

How about you?

I am a happily-ever-after wife, an Epilepsy Diagnosee, Advocate for Epilepsy Awareness (The Epilepsy Network), life lover & Christ inspired! Life is a journey and I'm loving every moment of it. Even the bumps in the road!

One Comment

  • Samuel Inglese

    Happily ever after spouse sounds so fantastic. My now ex. knew my condition but it was only every 6-8 weeks. I think she was certain she could control it with her Massages. But as time passed and beautiful children were born my attacks increased. With one job, Director of Food and Beverage for a Hilton Hotel, 8-12/day lead into a coma for 3 days only to awaken unemployed now, for 4 years, never able to hold a job for more than 3 months. The now ex. stated I was embarrassing and frightening to our 2 children and refused to work with me to open their young eyes. She has divorced me, taking our now 8 and 13 yr. old children with her for me to struggle to be with now that the older one is supposedly too scared, and my daughter with Down’s is at too high a risk. The ex demands certified therapists be present during my time with only one child at a time. $90/hr. I will never give up. For my children. For my Dream and BA from NYU as a Director and Actor. And now my Book about amazing attacks and my romantic and action screenplays which have character’s that happen to have epilepsy but as a part of their life out in the real world.

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